The second hardest element in the universe is Chuck Norris. The first only comes into existance when Chuck gets excited.
Chuck Norris is so sharp you can cut yourself just by looking at him.
If tapped, a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.
Chuck Norris sends his beard clippings to the police. They are used as bullet proof vests.
Chuck Norris can skydive into outer space.
The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
For Chuck Norris... In the game Monopoly every space is free parking.
Some people can ride their bikes with no handle bars. But chuck norris can ride his handlebars with no bike.
When Chuck Norris works out, he doesn't sweat. His body cries.
Chuck Norris inflated a flat school bus tire, with his lungs.
When Chuck Norris visits Egypt, the sand didn't burn his feet, his feet burnt the sand, hence the discovery of glass.