Chuck Norris doesn't always drink beer, but when he does he has the dos equis guy serve it to him in a dress.
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Chuck Norris doesn't smile, his mouth smiles for him.
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Only Chuck Norris can dislike on Facebook.
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Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
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Chuck Norris was a comedian, but everyone started to die of laughter.
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Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
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If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.
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Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
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Chuck Norris drives an ice cream truck covered in human skulls.
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I named my dog Chuck Norris, but I couldn't train him because no one tells Chuck Norris what to do.
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Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
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