Time waits for no man.
Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
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Some people like to eat frogs' legs.
Chuck Norris likes to eat lizard legs.
Hence, snakes.
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Chuck Norris is not hung like a horse... horses are hung like Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
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Chuck Norris used to be a soccer referee.
He lost the job after giving penalties to the players: Death Penalty.
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Chuck Norris' feet are so fast, he can kick you in the past.
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Chuck Norris cleans his teeth with a dentists drill.
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Chuck Norris once ate a bottle of sleeping pills.
They made him blink.
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Don't type "Chuck Norris" on Monster Milktruck, your milk will turn into beer.
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Chuck Norris knows your reading this...
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Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
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