Time waits for no man.
Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
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A company once tried to make Chuck Norris toilet paper, but they soon realized it wouldn't work because Chuck Norris won't take shit from anyone.
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When Bruce Banner's angry he turn into the Hulk.
When the Hulk's angry he turns into Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris does not have to "Fight for his right to Party".
Parties have to fight for their right to Chuck Norris.
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When Steven Seagal kills a ninja, he only takes its hide.
When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he uses every part.
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Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t ride a horse, he uses his crotch to carry it.
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Chuck Norris built Rome with a box of scraps.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president.
If you’re thinking to yourself, “But Chuck Norris isn’t black”, then you are dead wrong.
And stop being a racist.
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Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
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