Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Person 1: Global Warming doesn't exist. Chuck Norris was cold so he turned the sun up. Person 2: That's bullhsh*t! everyone knows Chuck Norris doesn't get cold!
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain...the snake died.
You know "The Matrix" that was Chuck Norris' very first dream.
Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
Chuck Norris can do a downward uppercut.
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
Chuck Norris doesn't compete, he wins.
Chuck Norris can do a roundhouse kick with his arms.
Chuck Norris does not have to "Fight for his right to Party". Parties have to fight for their right to Chuck Norris.