Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA.
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Some people have alter egos.
Chuck Norris has no such thing.
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Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
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Scientists have developed a way to travel through time, by being on the recieving end of a roundhouse kick by Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine.
He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself.
Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
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If Chuck Norris was a villian in a video game, you'll never win.
But if he was the hero, it's unplayable; because no one controls Chuck Norris.
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Keep your friends close, and your enemies close to Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris was born, the only person crying was the doctor.
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Film makers are smart enough NOT to make a Chuck Norris movie in 3D.
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Many years ago Chuck Norris and a brown bear had a fight.
The loser had to go live in the north pole.
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In the Matrix, the bullets try to dodge Chuck Norris - and fail.
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