Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA.
Most kids pee their name into snow... Chuck Norris pisses his in concreate...
Chuck Norris eats blackholes as light snacks.
Chuck Norris commited suicide, and lived.
Once Chuck Norris went to Mc Donalds and had a pizza.
The ground hog only pokes his head out to check for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once stood on a bridge in London. Then they wrote a song about it.
Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
Chuck Norris once won a three-legged race... By himself.