Chuck Norris cleans his teeth with a dentists drill.
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Chuck Norris won a guitar battle with a violin.
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Chuck Norris can tie your hands behind your back with both hands tied behind his back.
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Chuck norris can fix a plumbers crack.
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Chuck Norris once hit 3 touchdowns during a friendly game of full-contact bowling.
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Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest.
Chuck Norris won by 5.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use a fire extinguisher to put out fires... he just tells the fire to stop burning.
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The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town.
They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
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Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
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The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there.
In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.
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Some say Chuck once sneezed a rhino inside out.
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