Chuck Norris climbed the stairway to heaven, and came back down again.
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Chuck Norris sees dead people...and they run.
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The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Once chuck norris and time had race.
Result: The time is still running.
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Chuck Norris likes steel wool... it's his loofah.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey.
The country there now is only an impostor.
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Meteors didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just needed a new pair of boots.
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If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
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If Chuck Norris were to ever bungee jump, the earth would flinch.
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Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
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