Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
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James Cameron wanted Chuck Norris to play the Terminator.
However, upon reflection, he realized that would have turned his movie into a documentary, so he went with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
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R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
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Chuck Norris once ate a bottle of sleeping pills.
They made him blink.
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The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway.
But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
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When Chuck Norris' dreams come true, your worst nightmares begin.
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When God said "Let there be light!", Chuck Norris said "Only for half the day."
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Pluto is actually an orbiting group of British soldiers from the American Revolution who entered space after the Chuck gave them a roundhouse kick to the face.
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There is no use crying over split milk, unless it's Chuck Norris' milk.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to face the consequences, the consequences have to face Chuck Norris.
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Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine.
We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
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