Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
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Chuck Norris actually painted all of the colors of the wind.
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When Chuck Norris steals a car he forces it to start.
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In 1666, Chuck Norris caught the Plague.
The Plague learned its lesson, and has stayed away since then.
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Chuck Norris once slapped a man into next week.
The man was missing for four and a half years.
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Chuck Norris can unscramble eggs.
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Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
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Chuck Norris had a knife thrown at him... the knife didn't impale him, he impaled the knife.
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When the metal detector goes off at the airport, it is just verifying Chuck Norris walked through.
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When Chuck Norris works out at the gym, he doesn't sweat.
The weights do.
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If Chuck Norris appears in your dream, don't panic, he is only looking for Freddy Krueger.
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