You don't invite Chuck Norris.
He invites himself.
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To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.
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When Chuck Norris steals a car he forces it to start.
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It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
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They wanted to put Chuck Norris's face on Mount Rushmore, but the granite wasn't hard enough for his beard.
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A black hole is where Chuck Norris ripped the universe a new one.
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Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
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WikiLeaks are just Chuck Norris' Thoughts.
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Chuck Norris was a comedian, but everyone started to die of laughter.
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When Chuck Norris was 8 years old he got into a pillow fight with his older brother, that's why he's now an only child.
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Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child.
The bed went itself out of fear.
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