Reading Chuck Norris Facts is the same as learning history.
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
Only once in history has Chuck Norris snapped his fingers, scientists call it The Big Bang.
“The Day the Earth Stood Still” is based off the one day in Earth’s history when Chuck Norris slept.
The answer to all the questions on your history test tomorrow is Chuck Norris.
Those who ignore history, are doomed by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can write history of the future.
The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there. "Please," protested the college president, "you already make more than the entire History department." "Yeah, maybe so, but you don't know what I have to put up with," the coach blustered. "Look." He went out into the hall and grabbed a jock who was jogging down the hallway. "Run over to my office and see if I'm there," he ordered. Twenty minutes later the jock returned, sweaty and out of breath. "You're not there, sir," he reported. "Oh, I see what you mean," conceded the president, scratching his head. "I would have phoned."
The 21st century: Deleting history is more important than making it.
Yo Mama so old... When she was at school...there was No history class!
Chuck Norris will never die. The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.