Chuck Norris always wins at Jenga, the tower couldn't dare to crumble.
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Chuck Norris has a diary.
It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
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It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
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Nails wish they were as tough as Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... while it's raining.
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Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares.
Actually he can also blow your face.
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Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
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Chuck Norris' beard can etch a sketch a picture of chuck killing a man.
When the last line is drawn, that man dies!
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Apple, Microsoft and Sony, among others, strive to invent the most cool device to please Chuck Norris, the fail all the time.
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack.
Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
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