Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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Chuck Norris can break air.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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Chuck Norris is an action verb.
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Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunscreen, the sun wears Chuck Norris-screen.
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Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris shaves with a hunting knife.
"Shaving" consists of cutting a new mouth-hole every morning.
That's how tough his beard is.
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Chuck Norris has walked to the end of the universe and back.
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Aliens believe in Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can remember the future.
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