Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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E only equals MC² because Chuck Norris allows it too.
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If Chuck Norris drinks too much, he doesn't throw up, he throws down!
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That recent tsunami was caused when Chuck Norris dropped a pebble into the ocean.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to face the consequences, the consequences have to face Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can hit a grand slam with no one on base.
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A train saw Chuck Norris on the track and turned down a dirt road.
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Chuck Norris ate a sheet of paper, then later found an origami swan in the toilet.
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Chuck Norris lights campfires with fire ants.
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Chuck Norris can remember the future.
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Wanna know how Chuck Norris grew his beard?
He didn't, his beard grew him.
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