Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact?
A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
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The secret ingredient in the KFC recipe is Chuck Norris' approval.
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Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
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Chuck Norris went for a swim in the ocean.
The sharks headed for land.
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If you make a list of 10 things Chuck Norris cannot do, he will appear at your house and perform them all.
Your life may be forfeit.
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Chuck Norris once squeezed an M&M so hard that it turned into a Skittle.
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Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
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Reading Chuck Norris Facts is the same as learning history.
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CNN was originally created as the "Chuck Norris Network" to update Americans with on-the-spot ass kicking in real-time.
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The Grimm Reaper lost his job the day Chuck Norris was born.
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