Q: Why aren't the aliens making contact? A: They are afraid of Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris knows who A is.
Chuck Norris once stuck a fork in a toaster and the toaster got electrocuted.
Chuck Norris once won a Poker tournament using only Pokemon cards.
Chuck Norris can make scissors beat rock.
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
If you see the Blue Screen of Death on your laptop... it's because Chuck Norris found out you were reading Chuck Norris jokes.
The Hulk is Green because he envys Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not submit to homeland security, he IS homeland security.
Chuck Norris can take the bridge to nowhere and actually reach his destination.
Chuck Norris broke the world record for most punches in a minute with one roundhouse kick.