Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris can rotate text in MS Paint.
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Nagasaki never had a bomb dropped on it.
Chuck Norris jumped out of a plane and punched the ground.
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw a baseball, it just leaves his hand cowering in fear.
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The reason everything is better in Texas is because Chuck Norris said so.
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Chuck Norris thought 24 was a sit-com.
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One man said he got his butt whooped by Chuck Norris twice but he lied, because everyone knows you couldn't survive it once.
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Trains stop at Chuck Norris crossings.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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The Grinch stole Christmas until Chuck Norris ordered him to return it.
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If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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