Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
If Chuck were in the movie Nightmare On Elm Street then it would be renamed nightmare on Chuck Norris Street, cuz nobody dared to get near him.
Chuck Norris logged on MSN through the display of washing machines.
When Chuck Norris breaks the speed limit, no one can put it back together again.
Chuck Norris is the only person able beat a fish at holding his breath under water.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
Who would win in a fight between a bear and a lion? Answer - neither, Chuck Norris would beat them both with a single round-house-kick.
Chuck Norris... Chuck Norris... Chuck Norris... Okay, I've finished my morning prayers.
There are no bombs, Chuck Norris just jumps out of a helicopter and punches the ground.
How far can you spit. Try to beat Chuck Norris if you ask how far can he spit, at night look at the moon and don't wonder from were the craters come.
Earth is not spinning around the sun. The sun is just desperately trying to keep a distance to Chuck Norris.