Chuck Norris CAN handle the truth.
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Chuck Norris doesnt eat lunch, he drinks dinner.
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When Chuck Norris was born he drove his mom home from the hospital.
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Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Where does the devil go when he dies?
He goes to Chuck Norris for an eternity of roundhouse kicks.
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Chuck Norris once stared death in the face...
Death pissed his pants.
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Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
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Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
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When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
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You can't win a starring contest with Chuck Norris becuase when you look in to his eyes you see hell starring right back at you.
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Chuck Norris can find Osama Bin Laden!
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