When Chuck Norris decides he wants to kill some time... it's not a figure of speech.
He actually does it.
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The role of terminator was originaly played by Chuck Norris, but they decided against it as no-one would want to shit their pants for two hours strait.
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Chuck Norris never bathes.
Dirt is too afraid to cling to him.
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The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.
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Chuck Norris once shot someone with a knife.
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If Chuck Norris says his opinion on somthing, it automaticlly becomes a fact.
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Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people.
They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
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Chuck Norris's version of a "chocolate milkshake" is a raw porterhouse wrapped around ten Hershey bars, and doused in diesel fuel.
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When Chuck Norris goes through airport security he makes them take their shoes off.
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Chuck Norris can tap dance though a mine field... wearing clown shoes.
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Whiteboards are white because Chuck Norris scared them that way.
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