In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
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Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don't really kill people.
They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
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Chuck norris once killed a bear with an imaginary knife.
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Chuck Norris likes his steaks still mooing.
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Chuck Norris can do push-ups in a sit-up position.
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The First Law of Thermodynamics states:
Matter cannot be created nor destroyed... unless it meets Chuck Norris.
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The Hulk is Green because he envys Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris were to ever bungee jump, the earth would flinch.
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Chuck Norris can speak French in Russian.
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When nature calls Chuck Norris hangs up.
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Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.
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