In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
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Chuck Norris doesn't pay the government, the government pays him.
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When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
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Chuck Norris is a man of few words.
Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
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Chuck Norris won the Tour De France on a stationary bike.
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The Mona Lisa is smiling because Chuck Norris let her live.
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Chuck Norris can speak Spanish in three different languages.
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Chuck Norris can drink an entire gallon of milk in forty-seven seconds.
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Chuck Norris is the only person that can deliver a roundhouse kick in full 1080p, remember that the next time you watch Walker Texas Ranger in Blu-Ray.
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Q: You know the Roman Empire, well how do you think it fell?
A: Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris knows what the secret crabby patty recipe is.
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