Chuck Norris wears sunglasses not to protect his eyes from the sun, but to protect the sun from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris went to the virgin islands.
Now they are pregnant.
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Chuck Norris once encountered the men in black and he still remembers it.
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Water can drown if Chuck Norris stays underwater for too long.
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Always be yourself, unless you can be Chuck Norris, then always be Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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Chuck Norris has his own protien powder.
The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
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Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.
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When Chuck Norris works out at the gym, he doesn't sweat.
The weights do.
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Chuck Norris leaves messages before the beep.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled an Alligator.
He walked away with a new set of luggage.
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