Chuck Norris wears sunglasses not to protect his eyes from the sun, but to protect the sun from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris Turns his grass emo so it will cut itself.
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Chuck Norris walked right into Area 51, bought a Snapple, and walked out.
No one dared to move.
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Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a walkie talkie.
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When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris never actually moves.
He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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Chuck Norris froze hell.
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Chuck Norris can blow the answers away from the wind.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia.
While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
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Chuck Norris will never die.
The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
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While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
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