Bigfoot thinks Chuck Norris is a myth
Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
Chuck Norris once caught a cold, then he killed it!
Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
Chuck Norris protects his body guards.
Chuck Norris was once shot. The bullet died.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
A watched kettle never boils... unless Chuck Norris is doing the watching, in which case it explodes.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris once lapped his opponent...in a drag race.