Chuck Norris doesn't lift weights he tells his muscles to get bigger.
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Chuck Norris dosn't need a bullet proof vest because the bullets wouldn't dare hit him.
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Rocky Balboa was a lucky man because Chuck Norris didn't pursue a boxing carreer.
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You know the movie, Alien VS Predator?
Well it used to be called Alien VS Predator VS Chuck Norris, but no body would pay to see a fight 7 seconds long.
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Chuck Norris cut's a knife with butter.
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Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
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Chuck Norris can over rev a revolver.
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Chuck Norris lives on The Road Not Taken.
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God is one of Chuck Norris's creation.
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Chuck Norris once wrestled an Alligator.
He walked away with a new set of luggage.
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Chuck Norris is like an F5 Tornado...
When you see him coming you better run for cover and pray to God he doesn't find you...
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