If at first you don't succeed, you are not Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't use a coffee maker, he puts the coffee beans in his mouth and boils them with his rage.
Chuck Norris once round house kicked a bear while on a survival trek in Siberia. That incident was known as the Tunguska event.
Chuck Norris once gave blood, it was put in cans and labelled 'Red Bull'.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
Chuck Norris has a black belt in every language.
Chuck Norris can facebook through a calculator.
Chuck Norris finished the Never Ending Story.
Chuck Norris dosen't get lost... Everything around him is in the wrong place!
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
Chuck Norris knows what the secret crabby patty recipe is.