Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
Chuck Norris went for a swim in the ocean. The sharks headed for land.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
Chuck Norris once gave blood, it was put in cans and labelled 'Red Bull'.
Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.
Chuck Norris made the llama extinct. Never spit in his face.
Motley Crue released a new song called "Roundhouse Kickstart My Heart" dedicated to Chuck Norris. It will be number one in the top 40 forever.
Chuck Norris can break his opponents serve with an ace.