Chuck Norris can stab a knife with a man.
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Chuck Norris' shadow stays ten steps behind him in fear of a roundhouse kick.
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The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
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Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
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In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size.
When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
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There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
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Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
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The Playstation Network is down because Chuck Norris unplugged his PS3.
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The sun cannot look directly at Chuck Norris.
It must use specialized equipment just to gaze upon his silhouette
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Chuck Norris installed iTunes... in Blackberry!
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My friend to me "I don't understand why Chuck Norris is the butt of so many jokes."
Me to the friend "Well he does kick a lot of them."
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