Chuck Norris dosn't have a star on Hollywood Blvd he has a constellation.
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Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light.
He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
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There is no such things as a tornado.
Just Chuck Norris proving that ballet ain't that hard.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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The chemical formula for the highly toxic cyanide ion is CN-.
These are also Chuck Norris' initials.
This is not a coincidence.
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In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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Chuck Norris can light ants on fire with a magnifying glass.
At Night.
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When Chuck Norris cuts onions, the onins cry.
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When Chuck Norris drives a Lamborghini, people assume the Llamborghini is compensating for something.
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All men are born equal.
Chuck Norris was just born more equal than everyone else.
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