Chuck Norris dosn't have a star on Hollywood Blvd he has a constellation.
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Chuck Norris once stuck a fork in a toaster and the toaster got electrocuted.
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Chuck Norris goes killing.
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Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
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Once, Chuck Norris only filled his name in on the SAT.
He got a perfect score.
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Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.
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Chuck Norris roundhoused a guy so hard he starved to death before he stopped sliding.
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Chuck Norris can skydive into outer space.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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Chuck Norris once climbed the empire state building and roundhouse kicked the human spider off the top.
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