Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
The first thing James Cameron saw when he reached the Challenger Deep was Chuck Norris snorkeling down to test his new watch.
Chuck Norris went up Niagra Falls in a barrel.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its decendants are known today as Giraffes.
There was no volcanic eruption in Iceland - Chuck Norris opened the BBQ season.
When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris. After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
Some people have alter egos. Chuck Norris has no such thing.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
Wet doesn't get Chuck Norris Chuck Norris gets wet.