Joke #7943

Why do men name their penises? Because they want to be on a first-name basis with the one who makes all their decisions.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: men

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A man in a pub asks for a beer. The barman says, "Sure, that'll be one dollar." "One dollar?" exclaims the man. Reading the menu, he says, "Could I have steak and chips?" "Certainly," says the barman, "that'll be two dollars." "Two dollars?" cries the man. "You're joking. Where's the guy who owns this place?" The barman says, "Upstairs, with my wife"." The man says, "What's he doing upstairs with your wife?" The barman says, "The same thing I'm doing to his business."
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has 84.79 % from 184 votes. More jokes about: bar, beer, men, money, wife
Why do so many women fake orgasm? Because so many men fake foreplay.
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has 70.43 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: men, sex, women
Chinese and American are in a plane. Suddenly, Chinese puts his shoes off and American is angry. After some time, he goes to buy a coke, but Chinese says that he'll do it. While he's gone, American spits into his shoes. Chinese gets back and American drinks his coke. That repeats a couple of times,and after the flight American admits, "I spitted in your shoes, sorry." Chinese answers, "That's how we do it. We spit in each others shoes, we piss into each others cokes..."
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has 46.70 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: men
What does a man call true love? An erection.
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: men
Two gays were at a dance. As they were jigging about the floor with each other. Two massive guys entered the hall 6 foot 6 20 stone and full of muscle One gay asked his mate "Is that the bouncers that have just come in?" "No" grinned the other,"That's the raffle."
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has 56.65 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, men, party
Why does a man prefer blondes? Men always like intellectual company.
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has 31.06 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: blonde, men
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
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has 32.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
A huge guy walks into a bar, approaches a little guy and karate chops him in the back. When the little guy gets up, the huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from Korea." A little later, the huge guy walks back over to the little guy and karate chops him in the back. The huge guy says, "That was a karate chop from China." The little guy leaves the bar, comes back and hits the huge guy on the back. The huge guy lies unconscious on the floor. The little guy tells the bartender, "Tell him that was a crowbar from Sears."
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has 78.01 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: bar, men
Q: What do you get if you cross a dirty politician with a filthy womanizer? A: Chelsea.
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has 57.83 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: dirty, men, political, soccer, sport
The patient’s family gathered to hear what the specialists had to say. "Things don’t look good. The only chance is a brain transplant. This is an experimental procedure. It might work, but the bad news is that brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves." "Well, how much does a brain cost?" asked the relatives. "For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000." Some of the younger male relatives tried to look shocked, but all the men nodded because they thought they understood. A few actually smirked. But the patient’s daughter was unsatisfied and asked, "Why the difference in price between male brains and female brains?" "A standard pricing practice," said the head of the team. "Women’s brains have to be marked down because they have actually been used."
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has 68.38 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: age, family, men, money, women