Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
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Dante's Inferno is based on a Nature Walk Chuck Norris once took.
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When Chuck Norris wants an egg, he cracks open a chicken.
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When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.
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Two halves make a whole.
Two wholes make Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
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When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons.
None of it is his own.
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Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.
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Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
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Chuck Norris once gave a fire hydrant a ticket for being next to his parked car.
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