Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
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Chuck Norris can gargle with honey.
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Chuck Norris built Rome with a box of scraps.
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Superman is weakened when exposed to Kryptonite.
Chuck Norris eats Kryptonite for breakfast without even a belch.
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Chuck Norris wins every political campaign, but politely declines the jobs.
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While learning CPR Chuck Norris actually brought the practice dummy to life.
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The only apocolypse that can happen is if bogyman insults Chuck Norris.
The whole universe goes to hell.
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Chuck Norris created Heavy Metal when he was upset.
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When Chuck Norris was kidnapped by aliens he did experiments on them.
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Chuck Norris holds the world record for most push ups done in a hour, the number is all of them.
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When Chuck Norris wears a mood ring, it doesn't say whether he's happy or sad.
It says he's Chuck Norris.
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