Q: What's grosser than gross?
A: Two vampires fighting over a used tampon. 
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Q: How is a pussy like a grapefruit?
A: The best ones squirt when you eat them.
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Friend 1: "I like my women how I like my milk."
Friend 2: "What? White?"
Friend 1: "No, expired."
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Joke has 52.81 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, friendship, white people, wife
Q: What's the difference between apple pie and pussy?
A: You can eat Granmas apple pie.
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What do you call a prostitute with a runny nose?
Full.
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I hope the children will never find out why I say "oops..." so often when I vacuum their rooms.
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Q: What's the difference between driving in the fog and eating pussy?
A: At least when you are eating pussy you can see the asshole in front of you.
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What's funner then nailing bin Laden to a tree?
Feeding his lifeless corpse into a meat grinder.
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What does a blind, deaf, quadriplegic baby can get for Christmas ?
Cancer.
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The bartender looks a little worried, but asks him what would he like.
"A cup of boiled water please"
"Water? I thought you guys drank blood"
"Today I was in the mood for tea", says the vampire while taking out a tampon.
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After nine years of marriage, a butcher's wife is tired of her husband's morning flatulence.
She warns him that he'll fart his guts out.
One night, the wife decides to put pig scraps in his pants, so he will think that he actually farted his guts out and stop the flatulence.
The next morning, the husband goes to the bathroom.
Two long hours later, he comes out and says, "You were right about me farting my guts out. But with the grace of the dear Lord and these two fingers. I got them back in there!"
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