The Universe is not expanding.
It's running away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris never has to wax his skis because they're always slick with blood.
Did u know Chuck Norris had a role in star wars.
He was the force.
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Steve Austin had to be rebuilt as the Six Million Dollar Man after he looked Chuck Norris in the eye, shook his hand and then went weak at the knees.
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Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a walkie talkie.
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Chuck Norris graduated from the School of Hard Knocks with an MBA - Mega Bad Ass.
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Chuck Norris Avenged the Avengers.
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Chuck Norris dropped an apple once, and gravity was born.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch.
He simply decides what time it is.
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The Twilight Zone enters the Chuck Norris Zone.
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"Between a rock and a hard place" refers to Chuck Norris' fists.
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