The Universe is not expanding.
It's running away from Chuck Norris.
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The best security system for a bank is when Chuck's money is in it.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF!
Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure.
Chuck Norris goes killing.
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All wars stopped when Chuck Norris said, "Can I apply for the army?"
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Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
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The Matrix once had to take the red pill to escape from Chuck Norris.
It failed.
Nothing can escape from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can cut a saw with a wood board.
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Chuck Norris doesn't play dead for bears, bears play dead for Chuck Norris.
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Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
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When Chuck Norris forgets something it ceases to exist.
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