Water needs safety arm bands when swimming with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to change the past.
He has never made any mistakes.
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Kimbo Slice copied Chuck Norris' beard.
When confronted, Kimbo's beard simply fell off and spotaneously combusted.
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Chuck Norris can watch DVD's on a VCR.
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
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Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.
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Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
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Chuck Norris is the reason why Einstein's theory of relativity is still a theory.
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To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.
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In reality, only Chuck Norris is allowed to sing "We are the Champions".
He has no time for losers.
He will rock you.
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Chuck Norris' phone never auto corrects him.
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