Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF! Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
The Question Mark was invented after scientists attempted to measure the speed of a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
Chuck Norris can beatbox with a triangle.
Chuck Norris graduated from the School of Hard Knocks with an MBA - Mega Bad Ass.
Chuck Norris doesn't celebrate Xmas, Xmas celebrates Chuck Norris.
Hiroshima nagasaki was nothing but the result of chuck norris skydiving in Japan.
If Chuck Norris is after you, don't bother killing yourself, he'll pull you down from heaven and kill you again.
Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear. He sleeps with a real bear.