Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
Chuck Norris said "come on" and "on" came.
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.
Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris doesnt eat lunch, he drinks dinner.
Chuck Norris once won a game of Space Invaders without shooting.
Ghosts are created when Chuck Norris kills people to fast for the grim reaper to prosses.