In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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Once chuck norris and time had race.
Result: The time is still running.
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Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris.
After 5 days of extreme pain... the snake died.
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Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
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It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
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A mathematician and an engineer agreed to take part in an experiment.
They were both placed in a room and at the other end was a beautiful naked woman on a bed.
The experimenter said every 30 seconds they would be allowed to travel half the distance between themselves and the woman.
The mathematician said "this is pointless" and stormed off.
The engineer agreed to go ahead with the experiment anyway.
The mathematician exclaimed on his way out "don't you see, you'll never actually reach her?".
To which the engineer replied, "so what? Pretty soon I'll be close enough for all practical purposes!"
Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
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Chuck Norris can split the atom.
With his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris takes a meteor shower in the morning to freshen up.
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Physics is bound by the laws of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because Chuck Norris only recognizes the element of surprise.
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