Chuck Norris can never fill out an online form, because Chuck Norris will never submit.
Chuck Norris was born Sept. 1 1945. World War 2 ended Sept. 2 1945. What a coincidence.
Chuck Norris bought out the Walt Disney Company with a car-wash token.
Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
Sharks watch Chuck Norris week.
When Jeronimo jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "CHUUUUCCCKKK NNNNOOOORRRIIIISSSSSS!" When Chuck Norris jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Chuck Norris can hear your text messages.
Most people have 23 pairs of chromosomes. Chuck Norris has 72... and they're all poisonous.
Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
Q: What do a bungee jump cord and a hooker have in common? A: If the rubber breaks you're screwed.