How do you know when an Asian has been in your house? Your computer is updated, your math homework is finished, there's a Vietnamese whore in your bathtub with a violin up her ass (thanks to a horny Chen Li), a dog in your microwave, and the bastard is still trying to pull out of your driveway!
How do you get a Jewish girl's number? You pull up her sleeve.
I've got this black friend... just kidding.
Q: Why do Mexicans have tamales for Christmas? A: So they'll have something to unwrap.
I walked out of the store and saw a car full of black people lock their car doors i felt pretty badass until i realized it was my car.
A Pakistani boy took admission in an American school... Teacher: "Whats your name?" Boy: "Nadir" Teacher: "No, now you are in America, your name is Johnny from today." Boy went home and his mother asked: "How was the day Nadir?" Boy: "I am an American now, so call me Johnny." Mom and Dad both got offended and beat him up. Next day he was back to school all bruised... Teacher: "What happened Johnny?" Boy: "Ma'm, just 6 hours after I became American, I was attacked by two Pakistani terrorists."
Once you go asian you never miss an equation.
What's the difference between a black guy and a elevator ? The elevator can raise a child.
There was an Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman working on the top of a cliff. The Englishman said, "If I have cheese in my sandwich tomorrow, I'll jump off this cliff." The Scotsman said, "If I have jam in my sandwich tomorrow, I'll jump off the cliff." The Irishman said, "If I have ham tomorrow, I'll jump off the cliff." The next day, the Englishman had cheese, the Irishman had ham, and the Scotsman had jam. So they all jumped. At the funerals, the wives of the Scotsman and Englishman said, "Why didn't they just tell us they didn't like their sandwiches?" The Irish lady said, "I don't know why my husband jumped off the cliff. He made his own sandwiches."
Q: Why did the Republican cross the road? A: There was a black guy on the first side.
Why do ghetto people always name their kids things they cant afford like Diamond, Mercedes, Car Insurance?