Chuck Norris made Dirty Harry's day.
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
Chuck Norris is the only known mammal in history to have an opposable thumb. On his penis.
Chuck Norris never gets dirty. The dirt is too afraid to even touch him or his clothes.
Chuck Norris impregnates women without having sex with them.
Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
Chuck Norris wanted more dialogue for his next movie. It was too short for release.
Yo mama so fat you cant tell if she got a penis or a vagina.
Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.
My ex girlfriend has a tattoo of a shell on her inner thigh. If you put your ear up to it... you can smell the ocean.
Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.