Chuck Norris is standing right behind you when you're reading this.
When Chuck Norris rides into the sunset, the sun is actually running from him.
If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
When Chuck Norris calls 911 it's to ask if everything is ok.
Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
Freds voice is high because Chuck Norris kicked him in the nuts.
Chuck Norris can stop the music.
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
Chuck Norris once wrestled a thirty foot snake, and then he realized he was just masturbating.
WikiLeaks are just Chuck Norris' Thoughts.