Chuck Norris went on Man vs Wild once.
The Wild lost.
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Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
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Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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Chuck Norris once drank a Red Bull and the can grew wings.
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Chuck Norris once got his arm stuck in a canyon.
After 5 days of pain and agony, Chuck Norris had to amputate the canyon.
It was a tough choice...
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When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
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When Chuck Norris got his first sling-shot, he created what we now know today as the "Moon", "Mars", "Jupitar", "Saturn" and "Pluto"
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Chuck Norris has a Roundhouse Kick button on his Facebook page, and when he deletes a friend they actually die.
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Q: What's the difference between Chuck Norris and a bear?
A: Chuck Norris has more chest hair.
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A bulletproof jacket is an imitation of Chuck Norris' beard.
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