Once, Chuck Norris told Nike to "just do it..." and it did.
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When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
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Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
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Chuck Norris can skip a sound track on the radio if he doesn't like it.
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There is no use crying over split milk, unless it's Chuck Norris' milk.
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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Chuck Norris once stood on a bridge in London.
Then they wrote a song about it.
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When Chuck Norris is put in a straight jacket to be contained, he doesn't go insane, the jacket does.
NOBODY tries to contain Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can give you a wet willie with a dry finger.
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Santa Claus goes to the mall to sit on Chuck Norris' lap.
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Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.
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