Joke #8846

An apple and a black person both fall off a tree at the exact same time who hits the ground first? The apple because the rope catches the black person.

What's the difference betwee Elton John and Princess Diana ? One's composing, the other is decomposing.

Q: How do you get a black out of a tree? A: Cut the rope.

Q: What was so bad about being a black Jew? A: You had to sit in the back of the oven.

I was a little taken aback when I got my receipt from the funeral parlor, on the bottom of the receipt, after the bill, it read, "Thank you. Please come again."

Q: What was Hitler's favorite toy as a kid? A: An Easy-Bake Oven.

Q: How do you make a dog go ‘miaow’? A: Freeze it in liquid nitrogen, and run it through a bandsaw…

There is nothing more depressing than a failed suicide attempt.

There are 3 men on a plane a Mexican an American and a Russian the Mexican says "I hate my country!" And throughs a soup out the window the American says "I hate my country" and throughs a pie out the window. The Russian says "I hate my country!" And throughs a bomb out the window. Then the plane lands and the Mexican sees a kid crying the Mexican says "what's wrong kid?" The kid says "a soup fell on my mom's head and she burnt to death." "I didn't do that" says the Mexican. The American was walking and saw a kid crying "what's wrong kid?" The kid says "my mom was driving and a pie fell on her windshield and drove off a cliff cause she couldn't see!" "I didn't do that" says the American. Then the Russian gets off the plane and saw a kid laughing his head off. The Russian says "what's so funny?" The kid says " daddy farted and the house went BOOM BOOM!"

Do you remember how everyone was trying to kill Osama Bin Laden? Well, since all of our presidents seem to get shot, why we just didn't make Bin Laden president.

Q: What is the worst thing about a vegetable? A: Spitting them back up in a wheelchair.