Chuck Norris was the reason the Titanic sank.
The iceberg was just a cover-up.
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When Chuck Norris wears a mood ring, it doesn't say whether he's happy or sad.
It says he's Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a particle accelerator to collide atoms, he just smashes his fists together.
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Chuck Norris can go Platinum on a Blank CD.
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Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth.
Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
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Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.
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Chuck Norris was banned from going to "housewarming" parties because he kept burning them down.
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Chuck Norris is why we don't need no stinking badgers.
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How many push-ups can Chuck Norris do?
All of them.
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Chuck Norris walked into a bar.
"OUCH!" said the bar.
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Chuck Norris can get a touchdown in baseball.
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