Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
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Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
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It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
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Chuck Norris can spit through bulletproof glass.
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Chuck Norris beat a laser beam in a race.
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When you die on Earth you go to hell.
When you die in hell you go to Chuck Norris' house.
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Chuck Norris tells clocks what time it is.
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A total eclipse won't look directly at Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris jumps on hand grenades to shave his chest hair.
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The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
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