Chuck Norris doesn't have an ESC key on his computer, no one ever escapes.
The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second. It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn.
When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.
When Chuck Norris surfs the Internet, he actually surfs on a virtual wave of 1's and 0's.
Chuck Norris dosen't need to stand on top of the empire state building to kill someone with a penny.
Chuck Norris was born Sept. 1 1945. World War 2 ended Sept. 2 1945. What a coincidence.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
Chuck Norris doesn't get shark attacked, the shark gets Chuck Norris attacked.