Chuck Norris runs until the Treadmill gets tired.
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The Sun is Chuck Norris' camp fire.
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Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
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Chuck Norris has a diary.
It's called the Guinness Book of World Records.
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When you insult Chuck Norris, the next thing you are going to see is a bunch of halos.
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The reason Chuck Norris has never been a doctor on House is because, he would find the diagnosis in one second.
It'd always be Norris Anger Disease.
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Chuck Norris removes the tag from mattresses, and mails them back to the company.
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Chuch Norris doesn't make threats, he makes promises.
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Chuck Norris round house kicked the xbox and made the xbox 360.
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When Chuck Norris was 8 years old he got into a pillow fight with his older brother, that's why he's now an only child.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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