Chuck Norris beat Halo 3 on legendary, with a broken Guitar Hero controller.
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Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.
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Chuck Norris invented 1080p so people could see his beard is made of razor wire.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid his parents took him to a beach in Georgia.
While swimming Chuck Norris pants came down and out popped Florida.
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There is no theory of evolution.
Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
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Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.
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Chuck Norris pitties Mr. T.
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Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
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Motley Crue released a new song called "Roundhouse Kickstart My Heart" dedicated to Chuck Norris.
It will be number one in the top 40 forever.
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Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
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Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
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