Joke #9309

Chuck Norris had six kids, they were called SEAL TEAM 6.
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has 40.39 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids, military

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A military cargo plane, flying over a populated area, suddenly loses power and starts to nose down. The pilot tries to pull up, but with all their cargo, the plane is too heavy. So he yells to the soldiers in back to throw things out to make the plane lighter. They throw out a pistol. “Throw out more!” shouts the pilot. So they throw out a rifle. “More!” he cries again. They heave out a missile, and the pilot regains control. He pulls out of the dive and lands safely at an airport. They get into a jeep and drive off. Pretty soon they meet a boy on the side of the road who’s crying. They ask him why he’s crying and he says “A pistol hit me on the head!” They drive more and meet another boy who’s crying even harder. Again they ask why and the boy says, “A rifle hit me on the head!” They apologize and keep driving. They meet a boy on the sidewalk who’s laughing hysterically. They ask him, “Kid, what’s so funny?” The boy replies, “I sneezed and a house blew up!”
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The saddest moment for a child is not when he learns Santa Claus isn't real. It's when he learns Chuck Norris is.
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Chuck Norris has 2 kids. We know them as Pain and Suffering.
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has 77.19 % from 90 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids
When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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has 66.01 % from 69 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fat, kids
In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
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Chuck Norris never wet his bed as a child. The bed went itself out of fear.
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A group of children once said, "Red rover, red rover, send Chuck Norris over." Those children were the dinosaurs.
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has 57.35 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dinosaur, kids
The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
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has 56.98 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids, Santa
This Christmas, Santa is sending a message to the naughty children to stop being bad. He stuffing their stocking with Chuck Norris!
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has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, Chuck Norris, kids, Santa