Joke #9487

The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
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Across all of the infinite number of parallel universes the version of Chuck Norris is the same. Nature knows perfection when she sees it.
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Last year Chuck Norris won the prize for best float at the Carnival in Rio simply by walking in the parade wearing his cowboy hat.
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Chuck Norris once gave a cop a ticket for speeding.
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Total Recall was based off of an average day in the life of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
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Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people, then it exploded.
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Chuck Norris can blow the answers away from the wind.
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He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris once gave a man the Hiemlich Manuever. That man still holds the record for most bones broken.
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