The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
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Titanic crashed into Chuck Norris' cut out toe nail.
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Kanye West interupted Chuck Norris and became Kanye East.
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Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
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Nuclear weapons were discovered after a failed attempt to harness the power of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is danger's middle name.
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Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
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Chuck Norris leaves potholes when he jogs.
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Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
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When Jeronimo jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "CHUUUUCCCKKK NNNNOOOORRRIIIISSSSSS!"
When Chuck Norris jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
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