When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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Chuck Norris has the right to keep and arm bears.
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Chuck Norris can turn carbon paper into diamonds.
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Chuck Norris has nicknames for his feet... Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
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Chuck Norris never wears steel toe boots, they make his roundhouse kicks softer.
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When Chuck Norris goes skydiving at 10,000 feet he jumps into the plane... from the ground.
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Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean.
The tsunamis were killing people.
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Chuck Norris doesn't do cocaine.
Cocaine does Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once won a game of Space Invaders without shooting.
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Chuck Norris sent a e-mail through the postal service.
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Chuck Norris does not listen to lectures.
Lectures listen to Chuck Norris.
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