When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet.
The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
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Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
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When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
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T. S. Eliot measured out his life with coffee spoons.
Chuck Norris uses a backhoe.
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Superman is weakened when exposed to Kryptonite.
Chuck Norris eats Kryptonite for breakfast without even a belch.
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When Chuck Norris steps on a crack he breaks another persons mother's back.
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Teacher to student "Why is every answer on your test 'Chuck Norris'?"
Student to teacher "Chuck Norris is the answer to all problems!"
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
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Chuck Norris can create tornados by running around in circles.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
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