When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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Chuck Norris would have attacked the Death Star with the Shield Generator still up.
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Scientists called it a big bang, Chuck Norris called it an alarm clock.
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Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
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Devil stays in hell because he knows Chuck is around, here on earth.
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Chuck Norris can do push-ups with his beard.
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Little known medical fact: Chuck Norris invented the Caesarean section when he roundhouse-kicked his way out of his monther's womb.
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When Chuck Norris laughs he busts your gut.
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If Chuck Norris were a cat he would have ten lives.
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Chuck Norris is so hard, he uses diamonds as stress balls.
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You know the movie, Alien VS Predator?
Well it used to be called Alien VS Predator VS Chuck Norris, but no body would pay to see a fight 7 seconds long.
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