Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
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In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job".
That is the story of the universe.
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Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies closer.
Close enough to drop them with one round house kick to the face.
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Chuck Norris can milk birds.
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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear.
He sleeps with a real bear.
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Once Chuck Norris attempted to punch through a brick wall, but the brick wall crumbled in fear.
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Chuck Norris has found what U2 are looking for.
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Chuck Norris is the reason you turn a light on when you enter a room.
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Chuck Norris doesn't tell lies. He changes facts.
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