Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
Chuck Norris is so strong, he can punch a hole through thin air.
Chuck Norris' beard can shave a razor.
Chuck Norris can do push-ups in a sit-up position.
The real reason that Oprah is ending her show on television is that Chuck phoned and said "That's enough!"
Chuck Norris beat the light speed by 2 hours and 23 minutes.
Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
Chuck Norris can win a football game by spiking a tennis ball over a volleyball net.
Chuck Norris once went to practice his golf swing at a driving range... his golf balls are now known as stars!
Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
Chuck Norris is standing right behind you when you're reading this.