Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
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The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
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Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.
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Paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, but Chuck Norris beats all 3 at the same time.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful he can jumpstart a car by attaching the cables to his chest hair.
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The Earth was flat until Chuck Norris looked in it's direction...then it rolled up into a ball.
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The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
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Chuck Norris can land a multi-hit combo with only one punch.
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Chuck Norris can play Bach's 9th Symphony with a triangle.
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Chuck Norris has proven Newton's third law of physics, there is no force equal to a Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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If Chuck Norris hosted TV series "Survivor" No one would Survive!
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