Chuck Norris can locate the nowhere.
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Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.
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Chuck Norris once gave a fire hydrant a ticket for being next to his parked car.
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Chuck Norris' name is never on the guest list - because if Chuck Norris turns up, Chuck Norris gets in.
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Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
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Obama's health care plan won't cover injuries caused by a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to the face.
Nobody would survive anyway.
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Chuck Norris has a basement in his treehouse.
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Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast.
They taste like chicken.
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Chuck Norris jumped the grand canyon...longways
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Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
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If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you.
If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
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