If you Google search "Chuck Norris getting his ass kicked" you will generate zero results.
It just doesn't happen.
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Chuck Norris roundhoused a guy so hard he starved to death before he stopped sliding.
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In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
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Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards.
Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
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Chuck Norris flosses with dynamite wick.
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Chuck Norris is like an F5 Tornado...
When you see him coming you better run for cover and pray to God he doesn't find you...
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Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth.
The next day he won the lottery.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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For Chuck Norris...
In the game Monopoly every space is free parking.
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Chuck Norris went up the creek without a paddle... or a canoe.
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Italy looks like a boot... you know who owns that boot.
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