The burning bush that Moses spoke of was actually Chuck Norris's beard!
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Apple, Microsoft and Sony, among others, strive to invent the most cool device to please Chuck Norris, the fail all the time.
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Meteors didn't kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just needed a new pair of boots.
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In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
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The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction.
No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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Chuck Norris doesn't flirt all he says is NOW.
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Chuck Norris doesn't cry.
His eyes sweat.
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Chuck Norris could stab you with a worm.
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Chuck Norris can shut the door open.
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Chuck Norris does, in fact, put his pants on two legs at a time.
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